Obsessions

Husband and I are obsessed. I am obsessed with baby bedding; he is obsessed with the floors. I have not been able to find bedding I like, and Husband is that rare male (at least in my world) who has an opinion on furnishings, beddings, china, clothes, etc. He has disliked every bedding set I've sent him. He found a set that he really likes. I like it ok. It's cute and isn't too stereotypically boyish. I was not completely sold on it because I was hoping to do a room that was meaningful to us and couldn't figure out how baby forest creatures were meaningful to us. However, I've accepted that neither the bedding nor the fabric I want exists right now, so we've compromised on the set he likes and we will personalize the room with pictures from some of our travels.

He has decided that he wants to make his own baseboards now. No white baseboards for him! He told me yesterday that he wanted to get some wood and mill it himself for the baseboards. OMG. Are you KIDDING me? We compromised on that as well and now he will use floorboards, which will look great with a little tweaking. And all it costs me is a visit from my mother and stepfather to help out LOL. He's made a lot of progress on the first room and hopes to have it finished next week. I'm just a tad concerned because we have two more rooms to do, one of which is the baby's room. I'm really proud of him for tackling this job but I'm trying to find that sweet spot between his perfectionism and my desire for the project to be done :-)

We're 22 weeks today. F felt the baby move for the first time on the outside, which was exciting to hear. She says he has hiccups quite a bit too. I had been thinking that we have 18 weeks to go, but she told me last week that since she never goes to 40 weeks, it's more like 16-17 weeks. Gulp! That's not far at all.

I have come out to work about the baby. It's been a little weird for me b/c my instinct is to run and hide, but I keep reminding myself that I need to make plans. I can't just disappear for 12 weeks with no notice. Everyone's reactions have been great, though. I was really worried about it b/c I know my coworkers and how weird they can be at times. So far, all the reactions have been overwhelmingly positive. A coworker explained it to me this way: "we love you and therefore we are simply just excited and happy for you." It's a good reminder for me to try to think better of people. Maybe they go home and say, "OMG. That is SO weird" but they haven't said it to me.

I also talked to HR yesterday and was happy to discover that they will allow me to use 6 weeks of sick leave, and I have enough vacation and bonus leave to make up the other 6 weeks, so I can take 12 weeks paid. I feel a bit guilty because almost none of my friends and family have been able to take more than 8 weeks paid or unpaid. It's a shameful commentary on the maternity leave policy is in this country. When I start feeling guilty, though, I remind myself that I've made a lot of sacrifices for this baby and that being able to have 12 paid weeks off is nice.

We've called the lawyer to start the PBO process, so hopefully that ball is rolling. I can't believe that it's time to start thinking about that. F told me that the pregnancy would fly by, but I didn't really believe her. It has though.

I've noticed that I've turned a corner in my thinking about the baby. I'm excited. I'm researching. I'm making plans. But I'm still knocking on wood and feeling panicky when I talk about it too much (I actually just deleted a sentence that I had written b/c I felt I might be jinxing things). But it's nice to finally be able to enjoy it a bit.

Clytemnestra or Ptolemy?

Many years ago, Husband and I started thinking of baby names and decided that we would come up with the most ridiculous names we could think of and try to convince our family that is what we are naming our children. For a girl, we decided on Clytemnestra (Agammemnon's queen) and for a boy, we decided on Ptolemy (because I have a thing for silent letters). I can't keep a secret, so the family was soon clued in that those were fake names. However, we still joke about the names.

Today was our big u/s, and we found out whether we will have a Clytemnestra or a Ptolemy. More importantly, the baby looks great, was wiggling and moving like crazy and was measuring as it should. The baby now weighs 12 ounces. A can of Coke! At first the baby was a little shy, and I was worried that the gender would remain a mystery. However, the baby eventually cooperated. We are having...

A Ptolemy!!!

A boy! I can't believe it! Husband and I are still in shock. F thought we were having a girl b/c she was dreaming about girls. I had thought for the past few weeks that we were having a girl, but today I woke up pretty certain it was going to be a boy. That means we are having the 4th boy in 8 months on my mother's side LOL. I can't wait. I don't know anything about little boys, but that's ok. I had breakfast with a good friend on Saturday and met her 6-month-old baby boy. As I held him, my heart melted. He was adorable, and I knew that a baby boy would be a good thing. I am in TROUBLE! LOL

In other news, work has been quite busy. I had my first management issue to resolve last week, and my two direct reports are going to keep me on my toes. But it will be good. A lot of work but good.

And what's up with this sudden snow expected in NC tomorrow? I checked the weather this morning, hoping to find out when I might see a snow shower and was stunned to see we are under a winter storm watch and might get a few inches of snow! I'm always leery of these sudden storms b/c 9 years ago, we ended up with a very unexpected 21 inches. I hope it does snow!

Crap! I've got so much to do, but all I want to do is look at baby stuff LOL.

2009 Is Off to a Good Start!

I apologize for any typos. I am posting from my iPhone (love, love, love it!!!!).

It has been an interesting week. Monday was my first day back at work since Dec. 19 and I returned knowing that some big organizational changes were going to happen. I had been told that the impact on me would be positive, but change is change and can still be scary.

I met with the bosses yesterday, and I'm now a manager! I am over our web sites and applications and have 2 people reporting to me. I'm still in shock but thrilled. I think this is a very positive change and will solve some huge problems I was having with another group. I'm sad not to formally be a part of my old group any longer, but we are in the same functional area and will still need to work closely, so in some ways not much has changed.

My new position led to me telling my new boss and one of my direct reports about the baby and surrogacy. It was the first time I had shared the info with coworkers I wasn't close to, so it was a good exercise. Thankfully the news was well received. I am not completely sure my direct report understands, so we'll see what happens.

Yesterday was a good day for another reason: F called to tell me she received the results of the quad screen and everything was normal! That is such a huge relief. I am ready to tell everyone, but I'm trying to wait until our u/s on the 19th. I don't know. I might cave next week. I think that and then the cautious side of me screams. Ugh. How do I get over this caution? At the very least I can say that I am more at ease than I have been. F has also been feeling more movement, including 3 jabs on Sunday.

I have some friend news, but the iPhone isn't super conducive to long posts, so I'll save that for another post.

Can't believe tomorrow is Thursday already.

-- Post From My iPhone