Monday, October 29, 2007


It finally feels like fall. I love it! It's going to be in the low 60s today, and it's quite chilly right now. I even had to wear a jacket! I still can't believe Halloween is this week. Husband and I carved two pumpkins last night, so we're ready. We don't have candy yet, though. We usually get a fair amount of trick-or-treaters. Our house is set back from the street a bit, though, and our street is in the middle of my large neighborhood, so we don't as many as we might. I love my neighborhood because the families really get into the holiday spirit. Drive down any street and you'll see fall decorations: lots of mums, scarecrows, and pumpkins. Many houses decorate for Halloween as well, ranging from basic jack-o-lanterns to full-out haunted houses. It's great!

In surrogacy news, I talked on the phone with the potential surrogate last week. It went well, and I really like her. She is down to earth, and we agree on a lot of things. We talked for an hour and a half, which is amazing since I really dislike the phone. We're planning to meet on Nov. 17.

I have been asked by several people how I feel about using a GC. I feel good about it. Of course I wish that I could have the pregnancy experience. Not carrying my own child was something I had to come to terms with. I have had several good cries over never POAS and seeing two lines on the damn thing, never having morning sickness, never watching my stomach swell and never feeling a baby kick--all those iconic, Hallmark moments of pregnancy. It gutted me when I first realized none of that was going to happen once we decided to stop pursuing treatment with me. However, what gave me hope and comfort was the thought that even if I were unable to experience pregnancy, I could still pursue having a biological child, and to me, that was the more important thing. Focusing on that has helped me deal with the pain of not experiencing pregnancy.


niobe said...

I completely understand your point of view.

For me, though, the decision to use a surrogate is one that gives me an enormous amount of relief and comfort. The experts I've consulted with have given me something like a 60-70% chance that I would develop preeclampsia if I became pregnant again.

While the baby might survive even if I did develop preeclampsia, I would be putting both myself and the baby's life and health at risk. Those are odds that I just can't bear facing, so I'm so grateful that I don't have to risk another pregnancy.

Samantha said...

I'm you and the surrogate had a good conversation. I hope the meeting goes well.