Monday, August 18, 2008

Irritable

I received my cycling schedule on Friday. I had called the nurse coordinator about it on Monday and never received a return phone call. Friday I went to the clinic for a follow-up for my cyst aspiration and the doctor pronounced my right ovary "beautiful" with a perverse amount of pride for his work (this was after I had been waiting naked from the waist down for 30 minutes, so maybe I just wasn't in the mood). Next thing I know one of the nurses is giving me a copy of my schedule. Turns out it was in my file with a pre-addressed envelope, which left me wondering what they had been waiting for and why they couldn't mail it out earlier. Maybe they were waiting for my follow-up appointment, but it certainly would have been nice (and easy) to tell me that!

I took a closer look at my schedule and noticed that the day I started BCPs is wrong. They have it as 7/31 when I actually started on 7/25. Therefore, I will be taking BCPs until 8/24 and not cycling until the following week. In the scheme of things, waiting another week isn't a big deal, but it does bother me that they might have made my schedule under a misunderstanding of my dates. I'm not sure where they got the 7/31 date. And these pills are so crappy that I started spotting the day I ended the old pack and am still spotting on the new pack. I guess I'll spot until Sunday and my last pill. Fun! Sure, I could call and try to correct the schedule, but something tells me that will be difficult and not worth the stress. As long as they realize that our surrogate's schedule is a week off from mine, it will be fine. I guess this whole schedule situation is just one more irritation I have with them. Use the correct dates, people! If you aren't sure what they are, call me.

Oh, and speaking of my ovary. Though my right ovary looks "beautiful," my left ovary apparently has a few tiny endometriomas (1-2mm). Um, ok. My left ovary which has always been beautiful. Did they just appear? Have they been there all along and no one ever point them out to me? I'm just a tad concerned because with the right ovary susceptible to endometriomas and the veteran of a cystectomy and cyst aspiration, I've counted on the left one to produce. And now I worry that both of my ovaries are crapping out.

Book club on Saturday was irritating as well. I invited a coworker to join my book club because I thought she'd have a lot in common with several of the members. It turns out she does, to the point where I now feel left out. Another of the members is rabidly liberal, which is great, but I feel like she is trying to turn book club into an activist book club. She and a couple other members are vegetarian and keep suggesting books about eating less meat and the awful conditions in which animals are raised. Ok, I'm an omnivore. I like meat. I also grew up with large vegetable gardens that were a LOT of work and my mother grew up on a farm. It's hard for me to take these romanticized visions of growing your own veggies and ethically-raised animals.

Sometimes I feel like what everyone is really saying is that we humans should just disappear. And don't get me started on the population issues. Every time I hear an author or researcher on NPR discussing population control and estimates, I cringe. I'm waiting for someone to call in and declare that these people doing fertility treatments should stop b/c they are contributing to over-population and maybe we should take a hint if we are infertile. Of course these people are all people who probably easily had their kids.

This book club member is also a hardcore Obama supporter and wanted to add Dreams of My Father to our reading list. I have zero interest in reading that book. I'm voting for the man, but I don't want him shoved down my throat, so I had to speak out against it rather forcefully b/c I knew that everyone else would want to read it or at least wouldn't speak up. Book club is supposed to be fun and now I feel like it isn't and that I don't belong anymore (after joining not even a year ago).

I'm sort of wondering if I belong anywhere right now.

4 comments:

sara said...

Ick - I'm sorry about the scheduling being off with the clinic as well as the tone of the activism in the book club. Cycling and scheduling stuff when it just involves one couple is challenging enough. I can't even imagine the additional stress that would go along with adding in a third person to have everything perfectly coordinated. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that this is the last of the stress with the schedule and that the spotting ends soon. I couldn't agree with you more about not wanting too much stuff shoved down my throught about who to vote for or what to eat. I like my meat, and respect those who don't want to eat it. But I like for all of us to co-exist peacefully without influencing each other too much in a negative way - just like you said. Good point!

Kymberli said...

Sounds like it might be time for a new book club. Somewhere new with new faces would be a nice change of pace, probably.

Ugh - hopefully this will be the only cycling hiccup. Just remember - it takes a lot to mess up synchronization, so a blip with the BCPs won't cause too much of a problem unless it throws your periods way off from one another.

Cycling!!! Finally! :)

Samantha said...

Just when they start doing something right, they turn around and screw it up, huh? I'm still thrilled that you will actually be starting, but I would indeed make sure that the clinic has your and the surrogate on the same schedule!

Strong opinions on either side of the political spectrum are never welcome at such unexpected places and when you are already feeling tired and overwhelmed. I hope your book club can keep the reading material a little lighter!

nutmeg96 said...

The schedule thing must be extra frustrating since you clearly asked for it a couple of weeks ago and they blew you off. :( Hopefully everything will work out anyway, but you don't need this extra stress!